The Letter
Get date ideas, relationship advice, and exclusive event invites — written by the member care team who read your messages every day.
What arrives
No 3,000-word essays. Every letter has the same shape: one idea about dating well, one real question from a member, and one thing to do this fortnight.
Small, specific plans — the kind you can actually suggest on a Wednesday without panic.
How to end a conversation kindly, when to suggest meeting, what a healthy pace looks like.
Member dinners and meetups in select cities. Newsletter readers hear about them first.
Updates on scams, verification and privacy settings, in plain language.
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A recent letter
An excerpt, so you know exactly what you are signing up for. Nothing salesy, nothing that pretends dating is easy.
Most first dates go fine. The second one is where people freeze — because the first has a script, and the second does not.
Our advice, after reading several thousand messages from members, is to plan the second date before the first one ends. Not the whole evening. Just a shape: a walk, a market, a film neither of you has seen. Suggesting it early does two useful things. It tells the other person you would like to see them again, and it removes the strange week of silence where both of you wait to be asked.
If they say no, you have lost an evening, not a month. That is a good trade.
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